Monday, March 29, 2010

Oh Man, My Life.

So, believe it or not, writers go through periods of time where they hate writing. Well, that's why I haven't written. Allow me to summarize what I've been up to. I went to Tennessee for spring break, can't lie, that was pretty rad. We blew one of the speakers in my grandma's buick jammin to kesha on one of our nightly adventures to Gatlinburg. When I got back I got to hang with my bff, whom I adore. I'm back at college now, and I brought three razor scooters with me. My fellow hallmates and I thoroughly enjoy riding these around. But, if I'm honest, I don't have too much going on. I'm going to Illinois this weekend with my buddy Sarah. Overly pumped! I'm ready to experience some serious fun.
Right now, one of my biggest issues is trying to figure out why relationships EPICALLY fail. Any ideas? How on earth do people who claim to love you, whether platonic or romantic, decide that they don't care anymore? What happens to driving in the summer with the windows down, hanging out at someone's house doing all kinds of random stuff, staying up till five a.m. talking about everything in the world. Two personal scenarios come to mind. Summer of 2006 was probably the best summer of my life. We would be in the car driving to go ciffjumping, dancing to whatever came on the radio. We'd drive around town with the windows down blaring Jack's Mannequin, and laughing at how our 'stunna shades' made us look so ridiculous. We'd sneak out onto Mary's (the aunt of my best friend at the time) roof and stargaze at ridiculous hours of the night. It was the summer of my first love, the summer that plays a big part in who I am today. There was a group of about ten of us who conistently hung out, my boyfriend and his friends, me and my friends. My hometown is small already, but everyone knew who we were. We'd go through Wendy's drive-thru blaring/singing What If God Was One Of Us, and Black Betty. Haha, oh man, those were the days. Doesn't this seem like a sort of friendship circle that we'd still be together now, four years later, talking about this together? You'd think so, but it all turned out very differently. I miss them terribly, but we all just stopped talking. There's no explanation, no way to even begin to fathom why it all fell apart. Was it school, work, loss of interest? No one can really say. Why does anything like that fall apart? There's never going to be a direct answer as to why life has seasons, and why we can't hang onto the same people our whole lives. I know where all of them are now, and if you ever want to know, just ask. The point of all of this is, why don't we fight harder to maintain stable relationships with people we care about? Why do people you love right now become that great story you tell three years later when your new best friend says "what's been the best summer of your life?" When do bonfires in mid-July become something that you've stuffed under the rug, only voicing if you run into those friends at Wal-Mart, or someone new asks what you used to do. What is the exact day that that happens? Do we wake up and tell ourselves that none of that matters anymore? I don't think that anyone will really understand. Most of the time someone's common answer is 'that's just life.' But if you think about it, that ISN'T life. Life is when you're with those people, everyday has an agenda for history in the making. When you meeet them, they aren't supposed to become history. The things you do together are memories, things of the past. But is there any reason why you can't wake up and call that person and go out for coffee anymore? Very recently, I was just with my friend (whom I'll refer to as.. hmm.. Jessie) and she was crying over this exact same thing. Jessie and this person were unfathomably close, they were best friends. They were together everyday, creating their own history in the making. Right now, they don't talk. Who decided that? What day, what time, what hour was it decided that things couldn't ever be the same between them? Jessie, like myself, has no idea where it went wrong, why it can't be the same. NO ONE knows. Moral of these stories, I know that you remember a time with someone, or several people, when you felt like nothing in the world could change the current circumstances. But now, they're not the same at all, why? Pick up your phone and text them. Remind them of that bonfire when Alex burnt his pants, or that time at the mall when you belched really loud in Blondie's Cookies. Re-connect with them, it can't ever be too late to continue history.


just for random information.. "I'm Ready" by Jack's Mannequin was the song we'd drive around to with the windows down. check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx7LZxpUS50